Letter to the Editor #1

Dear Irritated Tulsan,

My wife and I were out shopping Sunday and we noticed that if you are fat, (I don’t mean chubby or a little plump, I mean so big that you can’t touch your penis or vagina with both hands at the same time.)

Not a pretty picture I know, and try not to think about it the next time you see one of these people.

As I was saying, it seems that if you are fat, ugly (as in so ugly it looks like their face caught on fire and the flames were extinguished with a hatchet) and you add rudeness to the mix, it somehow qualifies you to not only park in the handicapped spots with out any type of proper licensing or decals, but that you also get to drive around in the little scooters with the small basket attached to the front.

This special class of people were in full force Sunday.  One lady in particular kept cutting us off so she could zoom ahead of us, get off her scooter-cart, grab items to toss into her basket, and then zoom off to the next location. There was also this guy, I think? It looked like a guy, so that’s what I’m going with. Anyway, this guy’s basket on the front of his scooter-cart was so full that he couldn’t see over the top of it.  He had to look around it from the side, not to mention he had items stacked down by his feet. I honestly think I heard the scooter he was on crying in anguish. I have never felt so sorry for a piece of machinery.

Anyhow, just thought I would offer up my observation and see what your thoughts are.

Name withheld

 

Dear Reader,

Great observation.  The people that use motorized carts, are the same people that should be walking. This type tends to shop at Wal-Mart, eat at Golden Corral and watch Jerry Springer religiously. Every time I see this breed, I get one step closer to bulimia. As for the parking in the handicap spot, I don’t think shoving twinkies and hohos in your mouth should quality for the right to park there. If that were the case, 98 percent of the U.S. could legally park in a handicap spot. Next time you see someone in a motorized cart, push them out. You’ll feel better, and it’s not like they can chase you. If they do chase you, yell “Faker!” Then run.

Sincerely,

Irritated Tulsan

 

P.S.  If anybody out there would like my take on any topic, you can email me at irritatedtulsan@gmail.com