Dear Jack*** with a Mullet

I saw you flip me off as you swerved through traffic. That’s why I purposely maintained the speed of the car in the left lane. I’d move a couple of inches forward. You’d jump in my lane. I’d slow down a bit. You’d jump to the other lane.

I enjoyed it.

You and your early 90s Billy Ray Cyrus mullet needs to slow down. What’s your rush? An emergency dentist appointment to clean your tooth? A make out-session with your sister?

I know I don’t set the example with patience, but I don’t drive like a maniac not caring who’s around me. I do care about not killing people with my car. If you killed yourself, I’d be ok with that. It’s evolution, nature’s self-cleaning oven to weed out the stupid people.

You did eventually move in front me during your Kamikaze road trip.  I had my camera and took some photos, which makes a better reason to flip me off. It’s as if the effect happened before the cause.  Too much for you to comprehend. It requires thoughting.

You would’ve seen me take your picture if you had a rearview mirror. Does replacing your rearview mirror cut into your layin’ on the couch and drinkin’ Pabst Blue Ribbon time?

Not only was your rearview mirror missing, so was the Dukes of Hazzard confederate flag.

So Luke Bo, rush home to your sister-wife and see your little ones. They miss their Uncle Pa.

You’re the reason why people support eugenics.

P.S.  Your tag is expired.  I thought I’d let you know because I’m a giver.

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