Dreaming in A.D.D.

(I’m often asked, “where do you come up with this stuff?”  The answer is, I don’t know.  What I do know is that my subconscious is more ridiculous than my conscious.  This is a dream about a friend of mine I had a couple of days ago.  I typed her this email, but decided to share it here instead.)

I had this odd dream about you last night.  I’m not making this up. 

You and I were leaving some building in South Tulsa.  It must’ve been in the future because South Tulsa looked more like Japan mixed with Emerald City.  Not the people, there were no Asians or Muchkins.  The buildings were tall and lined with gold.

We walked out of the building and someone’s van had paint on the passenger side door.  The paint was black and shaped like a crown.  You screamed, “nooooooo,” and tried to rub the paint off, which smeared it.  The van belonged to an elderly couple that was picking up their kittens from daycare.  You cursed everyone in the parking lot, including me, jumped in the van and drove away with the elderly couple.  I had to walk home.

I had no ID, shoes, cell phone, money for a pay phone and no one would help me.  It was going to take me 8 hours to walk home.  I stole a pair of shoes from a nearby skating rink.  I was really pissed about being abandoned.

I ran into a friend of mine that I have never seen.  I don’t know whom it was, but when we shook hands we turned into children.  Now we were children trying to get home.  No one listened when I was an adult.  It became worse when I turned into a 10-year-old boy.

I found a ski lift that connected South Tulsa and Midtown.  The ski lift happened to end at my house, but I needed $15.  I tried to sneak on.  These women that looked like men started to chase me.  They had five-o-clock shadows, hairy legs and wore purple sun dresses.  I ran down a set of circular stairs.  Turns out I was in a lighthouse that happened to be a ski lift across the city.

I ran out the lighthouse door and he-women released their attack dogs.  My friend and I tried to escape through a field.  This became hard because the field turned in a slick slab of silver.  It had been waxed.

I woke up.

I can usually find meaning in my dreams, but I haven’t figured this one out.  Maybe it’s because I had Jason’s Deli for dinner.  Hallucinogenic lettuce?

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