Dewey Bartlett Vs. The City Council: A Urinalysis

Mayor Bartlett and the City Council won’t play nice.  They fight about the budget, Bartlett’s alleged lies to the council, and whether toilet paper should be over or under.

The most heated issues, this hour, are the council’s access to city employees and the investigation into the mayor’s office.

Bartlett wants city workers to have a five-day notice if they’re called to appear at a council meeting.

Councilor Rick Wescott wants that dropped to three.

Bartlett’s response is “seven could easily become 13,” but he may have mixed his notes with his Viagra warning label.

It’s as though Gargamel is attacking the Smurfs.

Now, three Tulsans have sued the city council for violating Oklahoma’s Open Record’s Act.

This is no longer about budget, protecting city employees or if Bartlett lied.  There is a simple term that sums up these current events: Pissing Contest.

The goal of the participants is to out-do each other.  Everyone wants to be in charge.  Really, though, no one’s in charge because little is getting accomplish. The city council and Bartlett are too busy seeing who can piss the farthest.

However, there doesn’t seem to be a direct stream anywhere.  Bartlett’s urine flies around like a backyard Water Wiggle:  inconsistent and temperamental, while the city councilors seem content to pee on each other: inclusive and collaborative.

The core of this mess is whether Bartlett lied about a federal grant that would’ve prevented police lay-offs.  Did he lie?  I don’t so.  I think he read the paperwork, but was confused by the three-syllable words.

At this point, I have more faith that Tulsa Shock will win its next game than I have in the Tulsa city government.

Bartlett will probably go down in Tulsa history as the mayor who spent his term redeeming himself, but at least he’s marked his territory